Colin Powell used to be one of our military leaders. I heard him recently describe what it’s like to
visit hospitals full of recovering soldiers who’ve lost an arm or a leg or
sometimes both. He said, “I never say to
them: ‘I’m sorry that this happened to you.’
These men don’t want pity and misery—they want to talk about their
battles. So the first thing I ask is
always ‘Were you a good soldier?’ That’s
the perfect opportunity for them to talk about their battle.”
Profound.
Today a sweet sweet friend of mine told me that her heart is
completely broken. Knowing her
circumstances, I believe it. The Lord
put her into the fire two months ago, and last weekend He unexpectedly put her into
a whole different kind of fire.
Everything in me wanted to respond: “My sweet friend, I’m so
sorry! I see that this is extremely
painful, I hate that you’re going through pain and I wish it were a different
way.”
I can see four things are true here: The Lord is in control. He has my friend in His arms. He uses suffering to forge immaculate
character. And she is already trusting
Him in a radical way.
Certainly it’s comforting if she knows that when she hurts,
I hurt. But I don’t want to empathize to
the point of leading her to lament what God is doing in her life, even
(especially) the sharp turns that He takes.
So maybe instead of offering her my pity, it’s more helpful to offer her
our Jesus, who is far FAR more compassionate than I can be or even understand.
Tough times are often paired with spiritual battles. I don’t want to be a fellow soldier who comforts
the physical and emotional, yet works against the spiritual battle that’s still
waging. I want to hear how the battle is
going and help point her to Jesus our physical, emotional and spiritual Savior.
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